My Year of Reading God: I'm back

Friday, January 4, 2008

I'm back

I'm back at school now. It took me a couple days to get settled. I hope you haven't lost interest in God while I was gone. I have a difficult decision to make now. Originally I was only reading the NAB version of the bible on line because my Oxford Study Edition of the New English Bible was here at school. Now I'm back, but I have grown to kind of like the NAB, and it's nice to read it side by side as I write this blog. I think I will give my NEB a try for now, but might go back to the NAB. The chapters look longer in my NEB!

I am taking Constitutional Law and Legislation this semester (along with Property and Philosophy of Law), so I will have a lot to say about topics such as flag burning, school prayer, abortion, the death penalty, all the issues that are just so important to us in the 21st century.

I promise not to give up on this blog, because after becoming a lawyer I am planning on making a run for the white house on my credentials blogging for Jesus, same as Romney and Huckabee are doing now. (When I finish this blog, I'm going to send it to Oral Roberts and Bob Jones Universities. I'm hoping one or both of them will give me an honorary degree for my bible scholarship, so I can claim to be a reverend. I've always wanted to be called Rev. Toenail.)

And with a first name like "Bible," I'm a shoe-in. Anyway, where we left off Esau and Jacob were about to be born, to begin the next really great story in the bible. I will finish the post tomorrow morning, I promise.

--bibletoenail

No comments:

Subscribe to: Post Comments (Atom)

Daily Quotes

"That dreamer shall be put to death, for he has preached rebellion." —Deut. 13.5
“Let her not be like something still-born, whose flesh is half eaten away when it comes from the womb.” —Num.12.12
“With him I speak face to face, openly and not in riddles.” —Num.12.8
“Moses was in fact a man of great humility, the most humble man on earth.” —Num.12.3
“That place is called Kibroth-hattavaavah [the Graves of Greed] because there they buried the people who had been greedy for meat.” —Num.11.34
“Are you jealous on my account? I wish that all the Lord’s people were prophets and that the Lord would confer his spirit on them all!” —Num.11.29
"They fell into prophetic ecstasy, for the first and only time." —Num.11.25
“The Lord will give you meat and you shall eat it. Not for one day only, nor for two days, nor five, nor ten, nor twenty, but for a whole month you shall eat it until it comes out at your nostrils and makes you sick.” —Num.11.18–20
“Moses said to the Lord, ‘Why hast thou brought trouble on thy servant? How have I displeased the Lord that I am burdened with the care of this whole people? Am I their mother? Have I brought them into the world, and am I called upon to carry them in my bosom, like a nurse with her babies, to the land promised by thee on oath to their fathers? Where am I to find meat to give them all? They pester me with their wailing and their “Give us meat to eat.” This whole people is a burden too heavy for me; I cannot carry it alone. If that is thy purpose form me, then kill me outright. But if I have won thy favor let me suffer this trouble at thy hands no longer.’” —Num.11.11–15
“The Israelites themselves wept once again and cried, ‘Will no one give us meat? Think of it! In Egypt we had fish for the asking, cucumbers and water-melons, leeks and onions and garlic. Now our throats are parched; there is nothing wherever we look except this manna.’" —Num.11.4–9
"You will not offer the Lord an animal if its testicles have been bruised, crushed, torn, or cut off." --Lev. 22:24
"How long will you refuse to obey my commands and instructions?" --Exod. 16:28
"It became full of maggots and stank." --Exod. 16:20
"They gathered, some more, some less, but when they measured it, those who had gathered more had not too much, and those who had gathered less had not too little. Each had just as much as he could eat." --Exod. 16:18
"The Lord will fight for you; so hold your peace." --Exod. 14:14
"'Leave us alone; let us be slaves to the Egyptians.' We would rather be slaves to the Egyptians than die here in the wilderness." --Exod. 14:12
"Were there no graves in Egypt, that you should have brought us here to die in the wilderness?" --Exod. 14:11
"Some day God will show his care for you." --Exod. 13:19
"A land flowing with milk and honey." --Exod. 13:5
"For God had tightly closed every womb." --Gen. 20:18

Future Topics

God's constant reneging of his promises reminds me of Jesus' turn-the-other-cheek. --Exod. ch. 14
Why Pharaoh is hard-hearted. --Exod. ch. 4
Moses' way with words. --Exod. ch. 3
Moses and the burning bush. --Exod. ch. 3
Joseph's solution: socialism. --Gen. ch. 41
Joseph's dream interpretation. --Gen. ch. 40
Joseph and Potiphar's wife. Joseph has to be played by Owen Wilson. --Gen. ch. 39
The legality of slavery--Joseph's brothers sell him to Egypt. --Gen. ch. 37
Joseph's coat of many colors. --Gen. ch. 37
Jacob wrestles with an angel, and changes his name to Israel. --Gen. ch. 32
Jacob tries to make up with Esau. --Gen. ch. 32
Rachel's big moment with Laban's "household idols." --Gen. ch. 31
Laban chases after Jacob in the desert like T.E. Lawrence. --Gen. ch. 31
Conditional promises: Jacob's vows are brilliant--always condtional. --Gen. ch. 28
Jacob's Ladder (Jacob's dream). --Gen. ch. 28
Jacob and Rebecca trick Isaac. --Gen. ch. 27
Mens rea--Abimalech didn't know Sarah was married, and God takes credit. --Gen. ch. 20
Again Abraham gives his wife away to other men to have sex with. --Gen. ch. 20
Lot's incestuous romp in a cave. --Gen. ch. 19
Lot giving his virgin daughters to the mob. --Gen. ch. 19